According to Sam and Jim Commenting on things that irk us off, make us laugh out loud or just seem too weird too believe According to Sam and Jim: Heart Throbbing for Someone?

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Heart Throbbing for Someone?

Tomorrow’s Valentine’s Day, eh? I don’t know what to get Kathleen. I bought her a card, but since both of us are trying to avoid eating things we shouldn’t a box of chocolates is out of the question. Maybe some nice flowers.

I know what I don’t want. I don’t want the Swimsuit Issue of Sports Illustrated. What a waste of money. $6.99 plus tax is too much money to spend to be momentarily titillated by scantily clad women in swimsuits that wouldn’t hold up to a careful soaking in the washtub.

I suppose I should buy Sam a new chew bone or something. He’s one of my little Valentines. This morning while I was shaving he jumped up on the bed and snuggled up on my pillow and was looking quite content until I made him get down. I hated to make him get down because he seems to like to snuggle up where I’ve slept or sat. Aw-w-w! He loves me.

I remember Valentine’s Day when I was in elementary school. In some classes, the teachers made sure everybody received a card so there were no hurt feelings. But occasionally, a teacher wouldn’t make sure everybody received a card, so when you arrived back home you had to look who left a valentine in your bag or box and sometimes, like in Charlie Brown, the little red-haired girl wouldn’t give you a valentine. Oh painful heartbreak!

I think I was born wanting to be someone’s special valentine. I had a girlfriend in kindergarten through 2nd grade then my folks relocated to another town and I had to bid Winona goodbye. After all these years I still wonder whatever became of her. I had other girlfriends off and on, but none really captured my heart like Susan when I was in high school. Alas, after two years of bliss her folks relocated to another town too. Owww! Thankfully, Kathleen made me her valentine 20 years ago and we’ve been blissful ever since (right honey?).

What’s your favorite Valentine’s Day memory? A woman I dated for awhile before I met Kathleen once sent me a dozen roses - to my office in front of God and all my co-workers! I thought that was totally cool. One of the most special Valentine’s Day gifts I ever received was the birth 12 years ago of my granddaughter Kaylee. Happy birthday Kaylee!

I guess if I could do anything I wanted to on Valentine’s Day this year, I would take Kathleen to a drive-in movie, make out with her until the car windows fogged up and I couldn’t remember the movie if my life depended on it, then drive to a certain bluff in California overlooking the ocean and make out some more. Man! Those WERE the good old days!

Right now I’m sitting in Barnes & Noble speculating whether a cute young thing at another table is anybody’s valentine. Surely, she must be. We all should have a special valentine, don’t you think? May your special valentine hire a barbershop quartet to croon you a love song and two bags of poop on not being somebody’s special heart throb. Cupid, are you listening?

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