According to Sam and Jim Commenting on things that irk us off, make us laugh out loud or just seem too weird too believe According to Sam and Jim: Wine is life (cheap wine that is)

Monday, March 21, 2011

Wine is life (cheap wine that is)

I came across an article in The Olympian newspaper today about the Taste of Washington.
That’s wine tasting, not salmon tasting or oyster tasting, especially not geoduck tasting. A geoduck (pronounced gooey duck) is a huge bivalve mollusk with a long rubbery neck). When that neck is stuck out of its clam shell at full military attention, it resembles – well, let your imagination run wild. I can just hear a geoduck whining to its primary care provider, “Doc, this thing's been sticking up and waving its ugly head like a cobra hypnotized by bad Yanni music way more than four hours!"
Incidentally, the geoduck is the official mascot of The Evergreen College in Olympia. I’ll dig into that subject some other day.  Excuse my digression.
 The Olympian article was attributed to Loretto J. Hulse of the Tri-City Herald. According to The Taste of Washington's official website,, the event  spans Friday, March 25, through Sunday, March 27, in Seattle. The event is a marketing ploy of wine makers and other industry professionals who want YOU to learn more about Washington wines. Friday, March 25, is reserved for industry insiders to hobnob with each other and give themselves awards so don't plan to attend that day. But you can attend educational seminars Saturday, March 26, at the Bell Harbor International Conference Center from 10 am to 4 pm. 
A reception and dinner featuring award winning chefs and Washington wines will be hosted by the Washington Athletic Club (WAC) later that evening. The dinner costs a measly $125 if you're a WAC member, $150 if you're not. 
Sunday, the 27th, a GRAND TASTING will take place at Qwest Field Event Center. A VIP tasting takes place from 2-4 p.m. and a general tasting from 4-8 p.m. VIP tickets, which reportedly get you in the door early, cost $125 ($240 for two). General admission is $75.  The VIP tasting will be limited to 1,000 people, so you'll rub some exclusive and wealthy elbows there. Celebrity chefs will be on hand to dish out gourmet cuisine and live jazz will provide the background white noise.
Humphf! The way the Seahawks played this year, I think they indulged in one or two grand vino chug-a-lugs and wound up with some serious game-day hangovers.
Wow, 75 bucks for general admission! At Trader Joes, figuring $6 a bottle, I could appreciate the great taste of approximately 12.5 bottles of wine. I also would save the price of a hotel because there’s no way I could drive home after glugging down mass liters of vino (like we used to do in the good old days in Napa Valley). So, figure another $200 or 33 more bottles of wine on the wall. And then you have the taxi and tip. Get the picture? We’re talking as many as 60 bottles of hooch here. If you can't appreciate wine after drowning your sorrows in 60 bottles of our state's finest fermented beverage, you shall be classified as a numba one red-necked unsophisticate degenerate. 
I would spend up to 50 bucks to check this event out, but hardly any event is worth more than 50 bucks. I once blew $124 on two tickets to see The Lion King and showed up on the wrong day; couldn’t get in. See, definitely not worth it.
I already have a pretty good appreciation for the bevi frutta anyway. My grandfather made wine when I was a kid and I sure liked what he produced.
I guess that’s enough on the subject of wine for now. Sam and I say ciao and remind you that il vino e vita. Cheap il vino that is.

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