According to Sam and Jim Commenting on things that irk us off, make us laugh out loud or just seem too weird too believe According to Sam and Jim: A Bad Football Team, Congress Fumbles and Doesn't Score

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

A Bad Football Team, Congress Fumbles and Doesn't Score

Sam and I are thinking we need to sic Pat Haden, athletic director at University of Southern California, on Congress.

The USC athletic director thought his school needed to be great again. That’s according to an article by David Leon Moore in USA Today Sports. To that end, Haden, announced that he had fired head football coach Lane Kiffin, who’s team had compiled a 3-2 record thus far this year and had lost seven of its last 11 games. When Pete Carroll left to take the head coaching job with the NFL Seattle Seahawks, the glory days of USC football departed with him - at least temporarily, and AD Haden said, “Our history has been great. We need to be great again.”

Haden reportedly was in such a hurry to dump Kiffin, to restore greatness to USC, he met the Trojan’s team bus at Los Angeles International Airport at 3 a.m. Sunday morning - upon the Trojans return from a disastrous game against Arizona State - and before the bus left LAX, Haden apparently said to Kiffin, “You’re outta here!” That’s almost as cold as the story circulated years ago about a guy fired by FAX while he was on vacation. But at least Kiffin didn’t just get tweated.

Pat, could you hustle over to Congress and hasta la vista those loser bums outta there? FAX ‘em if you have to. Boy you talk about non-performers. Good luck with your search scouring the country for a new head coach Pat. Sam and I think we should scour the country for some good non-partisan legislators who can return the U.S. to its glory days. Next time any member of the current Congress runs for re-election, we should vote for his or her opponent.

Personally, I’m afraid if we don’t throw those bums out pretty soon some yahoo generals of our armed forces may just take it upon themselves to stage a coup. Don’t laugh, it could happen. Then this country would be plunged into a second Civil War. Didn’t the Greeks and the Romans fail as great societies partly because their lawmakers bickered with each other so much toward the end? Or do I have my history all mixed up?

Of course, like many of you, Sam and I aren’t too concerned that some parts of our government have shut down. If we could just shut down the treasury department that cuts checks for members of Congress and not the department that cuts checks for civilian employees of the military and social security that would be okay. Don’t you mess with my social security check!

As far as Sam and I are concerned, we could probably shut down the IRS, the EPA (or whatever it’s called now), the Dept. of Agriculture, and others like that.

Sam and I don’t care if USC returns to its glory days. In fact, we’d just as soon it didn’t. Go Huskies! Go Cougars! Go Ducks and Beavers! To heck with those Southern California boys and those Arizona desert crawlers. Poop on you guys, And poop on Congress.





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