According to Sam and Jim Commenting on things that irk us off, make us laugh out loud or just seem too weird too believe According to Sam and Jim: Resolve to Pick Up the Poop

Monday, December 31, 2012

Resolve to Pick Up the Poop

Here’s a New Year’s resolution for 2013 for all you lazy dog owners: resolve to PICK UP THE POOP!

As far as Sam and I are concerned people who don’t scoop up their dog’s poop are vermin worse than any that might infest their precious pets. Those people give us a bad case of heart burn. If they don’t want to pick up poop in their own yards, that’s one thing, but they could at least pick up after their mutts in public places.

Sam and I don’t understand such rudeness. Some places it’s against the law to leave your dog’s droppings behind. Unfortunately, there aren’t many (if any) poop cops on patrol. I take Sam to this nice park near where we live almost every day and there are large signs posted about picking up your dog’s poop, with free poop bag dispensers at strategic locations around the park. But do you think that park is free of poop? Not on your chew bone baby! The place is teeming with other walkers, soccer players, softball players, rugby players and Fort Lewis army wives playing with their toddlers till daddy comes home from Iraq or Afghanistan - and piles of dog poop. Thanks to all the rude dog owners, people who use the park have to be very careful where they play.

Hello dog owners. A public park is not your dog’s private S - - - hole. Do I sound peeved. Oh yeah, I’m peeved! You people are lazy b - - ----d’s and incredibly BAD neighbors. If this blog ticks you off, GOOD!

I wouldn’t wish the death penalty on anybody who doesn’t pick up their dog’s poop, but maybe six weeks in an 8x8 kennel without pickup service?

I understand the reluctance to glove up with a plastic baggy and clean up after Brutus or Fifi - before I brought Sam home I swore I wouldn’t have a dog because I wouldn’t want to pick up his poo. But here I am, taking Sam on walks and wiping up behind him. I’ll live. The benefits of his companionship far outweigh the detractions.

Probably nothing in this world smells as bad as dog crap, especially when you get it on your shoes. Hardly anything is as repulsive as putting your hand on a warm, steaming, gushy pile of poop and picking it up. And boy can big dogs like German Shepherds or Labrador Retrievers deposit some humungous piles! Just seeing all their crap every few yards in the park makes me want to stick a shovel up somebody’s place where the sun don’t shine. But pick it up! You’ll live too.

Park employees shouldn’t have to shovel some dog’s excrement off the park grass so me and Sam and other users like us don’t step in it or so they don’t run over it with their lawn mowers.

People, if you’re going to have a dog, gird your lazy bones and pick up your dog’s poop. Don’t let your dog roam around in the park unattended so it can poop wherever it wants to. Keep it on a leash like you’re supposed to and PICK UP after it!

Sam and I would levy three bags of poop on people who don’t pick up after their caninus poopamounguses, but since this blog is about picking up that S - - -t, we’ll just wish you step in your own dog’s pile. Serve you right.

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