According to Sam and Jim Commenting on things that irk us off, make us laugh out loud or just seem too weird too believe According to Sam and Jim: Galloping Goose Livers Dudes!

Monday, July 2, 2012

Galloping Goose Livers Dudes!


Ta Da! This is the 201st blog post written by Sam and me. Bet you want to congratulate us huh? Cool. We accept commemorative gifts.

When we began pumping out this little bloggy thingy we weren’t sure we could post witty, provocative and sarcastic social commentary three times a week about things that irk us off, make us laugh or just seem too weird to be true. But we’ve done it! We’re hittin’ ‘em outta’ the park on a regular basis. Eat your heart out Sammy Sosa.

Worthy of note in the news this week is an article about California outlawing the production or selling of engorged livers of force-fed ducks and geese - foie gras, don’t you know? And you thought those California lawmakers were too pre-occupied with trying to stanch the multi-billion dollar outflow (like raw sewage) of budget bucks. Ha! Quack, honk, wrong!

According to an article in Bloomberg News by Alison Vekshin, animal rights advocates and organizations helped push this law through back in 2004. In other words, they royally goosed the lawmakers.

Now, the force-fed honker law is about to take effect although “This is not a crime that would be investigated by the LAPD or likely any other municipal police department,” according to a spokesperson for the LAPD. Sam and I hope not. The police, especially LAPD where they have all those movie star doperheads, are too busy busting people for possession of an ounce of marijuana - major crimes like that.

Nonetheless, animal rights advocates like Bryan Pease, co-founder of the Animal Protection and Rescue League in San Diego, are adopting a no-tolerance policy saying they’re “going to come down like a hammer on any chef or restaurant that wants to continue serving this very cruel product,” according to Vekshin’s article.

Sam and I are having visions of Daffy Duck quacking for his life and running lickety split away from Elmer Fudd as fast as he can. Except I don’t recall Elmer wanting to bash Daffy in the head with a hammer so he could eat his liver. Elmer wanted to blow Daffy to bits with a shotgun.

According to Vekshin’s Bloomberg article, foie gras suppliers have been over feeding ducks and geese through tubes to produce the fatty liver that’s prized for producing foie gras. The suppliers say that force feeding our feathered friends isn’t harmful to them because their digest tracts aren’t comparable to human digestive tracts. Uh yeah, but don’t you have to kill them to get their livers out?

I like foie gras a lot. Sam’s never had it, because I’m afraid his stomach might be too delicate to eat something like that. I had a friend a few years ago who could whomp up some really fine foie gras. He had a secret recipe and he tweaked it and tweaked it to perfection. It was scrumptious. He told me he got his goose liver from hunter friends and I had no reason to believe otherwise, although I did notice that our condo housing area pond was one of the few in western Washington not overrun by Canada geese. Boy, the way those geese can poop, they obviously stuff themselves pretty good without any help.

Anyway, three bags of goose poop - not Sam’s poop this time - on outlawing foie gras. Why don’t those daffy Californians go back to flapping their feathers over something important, like requiring horses out in a field to wear diapers so their genitals won’t be exposed - for example.

‘Nuff said. Sam and I are quacking ourselves up.

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