Love Your Dog. You will Never Have A Better Companion

Sam farted in my truck this week. I was driving him to the park for our walk when he cut loose with a big SBD phewy. The smell was so gross, my tongue swelled up, my eyes bugged out and I thought for a minute my life was over because I’d been gassed by terrorists.

It’s hard to believe Sam’s flatulence stems from what I feed him because he doesn’t eat that much. The reason I bring this whole flatulence thing up though is so I can talk about how much I love my dog - as we say in our wedding vows, “for better or for worse.” I vowed when I adopted Sam that I would love him always and that I would never forsake him. A little stink bomb now and then isn’t going to send me packing.

A lot of people do forsake their dogs. How sad. I don’t know about the rest of you but I almost can’t watch those television ads for the ASCPA where they show pictures of all those pathetic abandoned and abused dogs. OMG! It tears my heart out to see the looks on the faces of those poor animals.

I read in the local paper yesterday that a guy was facing felony animal abuse charges because he lost his temper with his girlfriend’s cockapoo who wouldn’t stop barking. The guy punched the little pooch, fracturing its skull, breaking its jaw and ribs; it had to be put down. How could a person do that? And I also read somewhere that some people dumped a dog out on a freeway off ramp and drove off without it; that actually happens quite frequently. Then there was the story about somebody kidnapping a little dog and demanding a $60 ransom to give him back to his owners. Only $60 though? What did that dog-napper need money for, I wonder - to buy a toke of our state’s newly-legalized marijuana? The stuff cost’s way more than that doesn’t it?

Sam and I like this pledge that I found on the LOTL Rescue animal welfare Facebook page:
“ I will never move and not take you with me. I will never sell you for money. I will never put you in a shelter and leave. I will never just keep you for your puppy days. I will never let you starve. I will never let you hurt. I will never desert you when you get old and blind.” https://www.facebook.com/LotlRescue

You also might enjoy reading a heart-rending story called Tank the Dog on the internet blog called "One Marine’s View."  http://www.onemarinesview.com/one_marines_view/2013/03/a-dog-named-tank.html The story may be a complete fabrication, but it really speaks to the plight of some dogs and how loving them can turn their lives around. The story is about a black Lab left at a shelter by a young Marine who was shipped overseas to fight in Afghanistan. The dog was adopted by another guy who wasn’t bonding all that well with the dog until the new owner read a letter the Marine had left with his dog.

Enjoy your dog or dogs while you have them. You never know what unfortunate circumstances might separate you. Sam’s wagging his tail 'cause he's glad we're together. Me too!

When My Dog Sam Smiles That sure Isn't Genetically Modified

My box of Cheerios this morning asked me to “Share what Cheerios means to you (me).” I was supposed to do that on Facebook.com/Cheerios. Another side of the box said, “Smile” because (again quoting the box), “There’s something about the taste of Cheerios that kids never outgrow.”

Apparently some adults never outgrow what Cheerios means to them, because a bunch of moms recently talked General Mills into swearing off using GMOs in Cheerios. The moms are insisting we need to eat natural foods and GMOs ain’t natural.

You know what GMOs are right? Genetically Modified Organisms are plants or animals whose cells have been modified with a gene from an unrelated species to develop a resistance against insects or to increase nutrients - something like that. Apparently, GMOs have been part of our food chain for the past 20 years and we’ve just been a little slow to react.

Ten foods that reportedly have been modified genetically include: sugar beets, potatoes, corn, tomatoes, squash, golden rice, soybeans, oils, animal feeds and (very soon) salmon. And all those things show up in a wide variety of products on our grocery shelves. So now, not only do we have to quit drinking milk (lactose intolerance); anything with gluten in it (bread, etc.); sugar (candy and cookies!); meat, and anything else the vegan-Nazis care to outlaw, but we have to keep on smiling?

I don’t know about you but since I’m diabetic I don’t mind if GMOs are being used to manufacture sugarless foods, like the sugarless chocolate pudding I eat, the sugarless Popsicles, sugarless candy, etcetera. Those things all taste pretty good to me. I don’t have any problem with farm-grown fish and that sort of food either. Sam and I don’t generally eat fish anyway

I sort of like General Mills’ suggestion that we smile when we eat our Cheerios though, because we need to smile more. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions but I am trying to put more “smile” into this blog. It’s been too easy to get down on people and events. No more having Sam poop on things if I can help it.

Anyway, speaking of eating more natural foods, you remember Euell Gibbons? According to my unimpeachable reference source (Wikipedia, of course) Gibbons was an advocate of eating nutritious but neglected plants. “He typically prepared these with abundant use of spices, butter and garnishes. A 1974 television commercial for Post Grape Nuts cereal featured Gibbons asking viewers "Ever eat a pine tree? Many parts are edible." While he recommended eating Grape Nuts over eating pine trees (Grape Nuts' taste "reminds me of wild hickory nuts"), the quote caught the public's imagination and fueled his celebrity status.”

Alas poor Euell didn’t live to be one hundred years old as many of the natural food advocates think eating healthy will enable them to do. I’m smiling.

Personally, it makes me smile a lot to think GMOs might be the key to feeding our world’s ever-burgeoning and starving population. If we could see news reports of smiling children with their bellies full of GMO doctored food, that would be better than having to watch them starve to death. Organic farming will never be able to keep up with the world’s hunger.

And hey! Shouldn't you quit feeding your kid Ritalin and vitamins and other drugs if you want him or her to grow up naturally? Just saying.

Sam likes the idea of feeding the world’s starving children so much he’s grinning and vigorously wagging his tail. His smile certainly isn't genetically modified. Sorry Cheerios.

Jane Pauley Says I Should Just Keep Reimagining Myself

Sam and I notice that Jane Pauley has a new book out titled Your Life Calling: Reimagining the Rest of Your Life. You remember Jane - a former Today talk show host? Jane says many of us have the opportunity to “re-imagine” our lives more than once because we are living longer than we used to.

Jane says : You don’t have to get it right the first time; there is no most authentic “you” waiting to be revealed; reimagining yourself doesn’t mean a total makeover; you don’t need to have a passion for something; and trial and error are keys to growth.

I like Jane’s assertion that there is no authentic “you” waiting to be revealed. I can’t tell you how many people wonder what God’s calling is for them and totally miss the point of why they’re even alive. I also like that Jane says you don’t have to have a passion for something. People make you feel like a failure if you don’t passionately want to do something with your life. I admit that people who achieve true greatness may very well have a passion they pursue relentlessly, thus achieving what most of us can only dream about. Still . . .
I don’t know if I can call it re-imagining myself or a passion, but lately I have developed a keen interest in engaging people in conversation, much like Jane used to do; maybe because I grew up in a family of seven kids and was raised not to speak unless spoken to. I find it fascinating to sit down with someone and learn who they are and what makes them tick.

For example, I had a new crown fitted at the dentist yesterday and I had a fun and interesting conversation with the dental assistant. We talked about several things then the subject of spiders came up and she revealed to me how much she loathed spiders. The dental assistant said if she saw a spider crawling around the treatment room, she would call the dentist to kill it because she was just too squeamish.

I think I’ve been reimagining myself in the image of my late grandfather who could and would talk to just about anybody, anywhere, anytime. I always admired him for that and I learned that it’s okay to open up a conversation with someone. It’s fun!

In my lifetime I’ve been a grocery clerk, mailman, sawmill worker, policeman, real estate agent, restaurant cook, writer and editor, business owner and more. I always enjoyed the conversations I had with people when I worked at those occupations. Good luck getting anybody to have a genuine conversation with you when you’re a cop though. All that authority gets in the way.

I don’t know if I’ll ever totally be what I wanted to grow up to be because I didn’t really want to be anything in particular (well, maybe a cowboy). But I’ve always been at least a B to B+ kind of guy and maybe someday I’ll achieve an A if I keep reimagining.

Two wags of Sam’s tail to that!

Resolved Not to Make New Resolutions We Won't Keep

We’re baaaackk! Sam and I were on hiatus during the holidays, but here we are again. Hope all you loyal readers didn’t leap to someone else’s blog while we were gone.

I don’t know about Sam but I don’t make New Year’s Resolutions anymore. I never keep them so why bother? I did make a resolution this past spring to lose weight and get back into some kind of shape (besides pear blobbo). So, I joined a gym and my plan seems to be working, albeit a little slower than I’d like.

Three days a week I drive to Thrive. You like that? Thrive is the name of the gym I go to. Don’t ask me why it’s named that, I don’t know. But three days a week I go there, even after walking Sam for a mile. I’m dedicated. I even think the owners of the gym should make a TV commercial featuring me on the elliptical or stationary bike or some other piece of equipment, and as the camera pans up close to me I could smile big and cheesy and say, “I’m thriving! I’m thriving!” Huh?

I got off to kind of a rough start at Thrive though. I went in there and told this young lady behind the reception counter that I wanted a six pack. She started laughing. A guy behind the counter laughed too and said, “We don’t allow drinking here.” My wife later told me I should have said I wanted a kegger. Smart aleck woman!

Anyway, I lost 25 pounds this past summer and started looking and feeling pretty good. I attended my 50-year high school reunion and sneered at my old fat buddies, ‘cause I still got it and they don’t. And I’ve managed to keep about 23 pounds of the weight I lost off. I gained a couple back during the recent holidays, so it’s back to the old diet plan and the treadmill. But no worries.

Still, I try not to make resolutions anymore because, I don’t know about you, but I seem to have this perverse reaction to resolutions - as in cheating on them in every way possible and totally destroying my resolve, thus seriously damaging my fragile male ego. That just doesn’t work for me, so no more New Year’s resolutions.

Besides, I have to drive past a cemetery near my house on my way to Thrive and I can’t help but thinking, “Won’t be long now buddy- especially if you don’t quit stuffing your face.”

Since I’m already thriving, I’ll skip resolutions and enjoy this life while I’ve still got the time. Why walk, around all pent up and bent over with angst and guilt because I broke my New Year’s resolutions? That just doesn’t make sense

Just so you know, Sam and I have decided not to poop on stuff so much this year. In a more positive vein, Sam’s giving three wags of the ol’ Shih Tzu tail to this blog. Thanks for coming back!

Merry Christmas to All and to All A Very Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas!

Sam and I are taking a little time off from writing our blog. See you back here in the New Year. In the meantime, enjoy our archived blog postings.